


Touch

by Aina (renverie)



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Gender-Neutral Pronouns For Reader, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Multi, Other, POV Third Person, Pre-Kingdom Hearts Birth By Sleep, Reader-Insert, Slow Burn, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-04
Updated: 2018-04-23
Packaged: 2019-04-18 05:50:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14206482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/renverie/pseuds/Aina
Summary: /təCH/ Verb. To put a hand, finger, etc., on or into contact with something in order to feel it.These are the times Vanitas touched [Name]—moments that he didn't realize that they were precious to him until the very end.





	1. By the Neck

The first time Vanitas touched [Name] was when he grabbed them by the collar and slammed their back against one of the desolate crags in the Badlands.

He was in the shittiest of moods—courtesy of Master Xehanort—and he needed to do  _something_ with this pent-up frustration. He didn’t feel like dealing with his Unversed today, but seeing **[Name]’s** face contort from pain would do. They wouldn’t be able to stop him anyway; he  ~~almost~~  always got what he wanted.

Vanitas’s lips curved into a sneer as [Name] gasped, [color] eyes going wide as they dropped whatever they were carrying. This was way too easy. Then again, they did come from training in the Land of Departure with those three idiots and their Master. It also helped that [Name] was a naturally oblivious, at least from what he observed of them so far. They didn’t even fight back, which Vanitas found disappointing, but whatever. This was his reward.

“Gotcha.”

With one hand, Vanitas pinned both of [Name]’s wrists above their head and kept an iron grip on their shoulder with the other.

_There’s no escape._

He relished the sight of his prey struggling in his grasp, the stress that accumulated over the day already melting away. It was a bonus that [Name] was easy on the eyes—not that it mattered so much to him.

On a normal day, he would be bothered by the close proximity of their bodies, but the sensation of catching his prey off guard was too exhilarating. His mask melted away to reveal a crazed grin as he moved his face closer and closer to [Name]’s until their noses were barely a centimeter apart. Crimson met [color]; triumph met fury. He chuckled at their scowl, committing every detail of their enraged face to memory.

_What a sight to see._

“What do _you_ want?” [Name] demanded through gritted teeth as they twisted their arms in various ways in an attempt to escape from his hold. As if that was the solution. Even though [Name] received training from both Master Xehanort and Master Eraqus, Vanitas’s brute strength against theirs was clearly no contest. Not too surprising, if you ask him.

“Entertainment. If you somehow convince me to let you live, I’ll let you go. If not, well,” Vanitas blew slightly into [Name]’s face and laughed when they flinched out of instinct. “I guess the Master will get angry at me.”

Color began to drain from [Name]’s face as Vanitas moved his hands down from their wrists to their throat in mere seconds and squeezed. He admired how smooth the skin he gripped felt around his fingers and basked in the scent of [favorite cologne/perfume] mixed in with their sweat.

**What a time to be alive.**

He didn’t even bother to suppress another grin as he took in [Name]’s pathetic state. The way their nails desperately dug into his hands but unable to inflict pain onto him. How the sounds of their choking was music to his ears while their lips were shaped into a perpetual ‘o.’ How wide their [color] eyes were from fear, perhaps for their life or of him. Maybe both. But most of all, how _weak_ they were compared to **him**.

_If only that old man was here to witness this._

“Vani… tas… P-Please…”

“What was that?” He tightened his hold, crimson eyes shining with glee. “You need to be louder than that, _idiot_.”

The sudden spark in those [color] eyes was another sight to tuck into his memory.

“Let… Me… Go!”

Pain flooded Vanitas’s senses, causing him to release his chokehold on [Name] with a grunt. The crackling of electricity lingered in the air as his hands trembled from the energy that was just there moments ago. He was impressed—not that he’ll ever admit it—he thought he was numb to all types of pain until now, thanks to being subjected to Master Xehanort’s 'training' for a year. The control [Name] had over their Thundaga spell was decent, to say the least, since they could’ve electrocuted themselves too if they weren’t careful enough.

[Name] collapsed into a heap on the ground, taking in as many shaky breaths as they can through a coughing fit. When crimson met [color] again, they glared daggers as Vanitas exchanged with an indulgent smirk. Expected, but _he_ found it amusing. [Name] was the only one he could rile up nowadays with such hilarious reactions without any consequence. Well, no dire consequences from the Master at least.  

“Hmph, not bad. Congratulations on living another day.”

“What do you mean ‘congratulations?!’ You could’ve killed me!”

Vanitas scoffed as he willed his mask to return to its original state. “That was the point. You’re still here and able to breathe. I don’t see the problem.”

That earned him another scowl as [Name] stood up to face him eye-to-eye. “Well, that doesn’t mean you’re free to do whatever to me! I am not a toy for you to play with, Vanitas. I am Master Xehanort’s apprentice too and I deserve to be treated as your equal!”

He rolled his eyes, already losing interest in the conversation. In Vanitas’s eyes, besides [Name]'s Thundaga spell from a few minutes ago, they didn't do anything else to earn his ‘respect.’ He had no idea why the Master took [Name] in as his second apprentice or why even bother to train them both—it was obvious on who his strongest apprentice was.

He turned to leave but was jerked backward, finding a hand gripping his shoulder tightly. When he looked back, his heart stopped when his eyes landed on [Name]'s for the third time, crimson eyes widening as [color] eyes narrowed. The fire in those [color] eyes burned away what he was going to say—Vanitas moved his gaze to the cliff behind [Name] immediately. A stream of curses filled his head as he berated himself for backing down from [Name] without a fight. It didn’t help that he didn’t know why his cheeks suddenly felt warm or why his heart decided to stop on its own. Damn this stupid, weak heart he shared with Ventus.

**What… What the hell is wrong with me?**

“You’re not going anywhere, jerk! I want you to apologize for what you did to me!”

Vanitas blinked at [Name] as their voice forced his mind to return to reality. Thankfully, his mask hid his surprised expression. Unfortunately, his heart still refused to steady itself and it was getting fucking annoying. Irritation seeped into his pores from his heart’s betrayal, but he can handle irritation. That was familiar territory.

However, [Name]’s eyes still blazed with the same intensity and it was beginning to make him feel _nervous_.  Master Xehanort used to have that effect on him, but Vanitas learned how to overcome it. He had to.

“Good luck with that. Playtime’s been over.”

Vanitas shoved [Name]’s hand away and turned around to summon a Corridor of Darkness. He needed to get away from them before _something_ happened. Being around [Name] for too long made him feel strange… **things**. And he didn’t want to stick around for too long to find out what those ‘things’ were.

With no hesitation, he entered the darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was supposed to be writing up chapter 2 for boy meets temptation, but I wrote this instead. Woops. Hopefully I'll be able to get that ready by tomorrow or so.
> 
> Vanitas has crimson eyes instead of gold in this universe because I personally headcanon that he doesn't become Norted until he fully gives in to Xehanort's abuse. Let's just say [Name]'s presence delays this for a very long time. I tagged this as Pre-Birth by Sleep because this takes place during the four years leading up to the game itself since Vanitas having [Name] as a peer would drastically change his outlook on life. 
> 
> Anyway, thank you so much for reading! Please let me know what you all think in the comments. Constructive criticism and comments in general are greatly appreciated. <3


	2. By the Shoulders

The second time Vanitas touched [Name] was completely their fault.

Flames rivaling the strength of a Firaga spell engulfed his heart in the middle of his solo training session, staggering him enough to drop Void Gear and fall to his knees. His right hand clawed at his chest as he struggled to cast a proper Cure spell, but the flames continued to burn him inside out. Vanitas gritted his teeth as his heartbeats accelerated on their own while berating himself for not being prepared  _again._  This wasn’t the first time this happened, nor will it be the last.

**Fuck you, Ventus.**

Taking slow, deep breaths to steady himself—as [Name] taught him, surprisingly enough—Vanitas closed his eyes and opened his heart to the source of flames. He honestly had no idea on what the hell he was getting into, but there was no other way. He had to find the answers and learn how to adapt before it was too late.

* * *

“Ven, we already told you to take it easy during training! This is the third time you injured yourself this week,” [Name] scolded the dazed boy lying on the grass.

A bruise that was the size of a small rock protruded from Ven’s temple due to him getting smacked in the face by the training rings he practiced with down in the mountain path. And boy, those rings did damage. It was a miracle that he wasn’t hurt elsewhere save for a few scratches here and there.

A Blizzard spell pulsed from [Name]’s fingers as they focused the energy onto the bruise to reduce the swelling and numb Ven’s pain, but they also took care to make the spell weak enough so that the skin around the bruise wouldn’t be harmed and to avoid him feeling unbearably cold. The last thing they wanted was for Ven to feel more pain than he should due to their carelessness.

“Sorry. I just… I just want to catch up to where you guys are training-wise. I don’t wanna be lagging behind forever,” Ven admitted with a small voice, his eyes focused on the patch of grass he was picking at.

[Name]’s heart melted. Ven already pushed himself to the max during his one-on-one training with the Master, causing him to request their homemade salve to help soothe his aching muscles twice a week. Unfortunately, that wasn’t enough to prepare him for the next stages of training. He mastered most of the basics but struggled with intermediate techniques. Despite that, [Name] believed in him. After all, everyone had to start from somewhere.

“I see. Don’t worry, you’ll catch up to us sooner than you think. But,” They used their free hand to brush back the damp blond strands stuck to his forehead as their other hand switched from the Blizzard spell to a Cure spell to speed up the healing process a bit. “Please take better care of yourself. I…  No,  _we_  don’t want you to get hurt again. After all, you’re important to us, Ven.”

As they retracted their free hand from Ven’s forehead, [Name] noticed how red his face became and bit their lower lip. Panic threatened to rise up in their chest. Did they overdo it with the Blizzard spell?  Does he now have a fever because of them? For the love of all that is good and holy, why weren’t they more careful!?

“Ven, are you—”

“Ven! [Name]! Are you two alright?” Aqua called out from behind the pair.

[Name] withdrew their other hand from Ven’s forehead immediately. How could they explain this to Aqua? What could they say to her? After all, it was their fault for making Ven’s condition worse than before.

To their surprise, Ven stood up and waved Aqua over to their spot with great energy.

“W-We’re fine! Well, [Name]’s fine. I, uh,” He chuckled as he pointed to his forehead. “I kinda overdid it with the training rings.”

A gasp escaped from Aqua’s mouth, followed by a lecture about safety and how to train smarter not harder. [Name] tuned it out as they fiddled with the hem of their shirt, unable to stop the image of Ven’s red face from repeating over and over in their mind. They were grateful that his face returned to its regular color, but it was worrying that the color changed so quickly. They definitely needed to give Ven a proper check-up later this evening.

“Hellooo? Is [Name] in there?”

At the mention of their name, [Name] jumped and found themselves receiving a worried look from Aqua and Ven’s hand waving a few centimeters away from their face.

“O-Oh. Sorry guys. I was thinking about the training I have with Master Xehanort over the weekend.”

For a moment, Ven frowned—perhaps at the mention of the word training—but it transformed into a smile instantly as he offered [Name] his hand. “You can worry about that later, y’know. Here, lemme help you up.”

[Name]’s heart lurched at the sight of Ven’s smile—also out of guilt for lying to him and Aqua directly to their faces—and consequently sped up when their hand made contact with the warmth emanating from his. His grip was gentle yet firm as he helped [Name] to their feet; a sensation they could never get used to.

“Thank you.”

“No problem! Wanna make it up to me by racing back to the castle?”

[Name] rolled their eyes yet couldn’t suppress a smile at Ven’s proposal. “You’re just going to win as usual.”

“And you’re definitely not gonna win with that attitude! See ya!”

With that, Ven sped off into the distance, leaving [Name] and Aqua in the dust. [Name] chuckled at his puppy-like eagerness and started forward as well but was stopped by a gentle hand on their shoulder.

“Are you okay? You were pretty spaced out when I got here.”

“Oh. Well…” [Name] looked off to the side, unable to stomach the thought of lying to Aqua again. “I thought I messed up while treating Ven’s bruise because his face turned red all of a sudden. I dunno what the cause is, but I think it’s my fault anyway for not paying attention. But…” They shifted their gaze towards the castle with a small smile. “I’m glad to see that he’s fine now.”

A giggle shattered the tense atmosphere. [Name] bit their lip again, confused and a bit hurt that a dear friend giggled at their confession. When they focused their gaze on Aqua, a hand was covering her mouth yet her shoulders shook with the laughter she was trying to suppress.  

“Um, Aqua?”

She waved away their concern and grinned at them, her blue eyes full of amusement. “Don’t worry about it, [Name]. How Ven reacted to your treatment is normal.”

[Name] stared. “Are you sure…?”

“Mhm. I think anyone would be flustered if someone they liked took care of them the way you did.”

“What?”

“It’s alright,” Aqua replied as she ruffled [Name]’s hair with a knowing smile. “You’ll figure it out one day.”

Before they could reply, a shout from the direction of the castle interrupted them. “[Nameee]! Aquaaa! What’s taking you two so long?! We’re starving!”

“We’ll be there soon!” Aqua yelled before turning back to [Name]. “Let’s go. The Master made us steak and potatoes for dinner tonight and I’d rather not face Terra’s wrath for making him wait any minute longer.”

[Name] couldn’t help but laugh at the image of a rampaging Terra as they jogged behind Aqua. They watched her back move farther and farther away from them, but [Name] kept their pace. They’ll catch up eventually to where everyone is. To where they belong.  

* * *

 As soon as [Name] walked out of the Corridor of Light, Vanitas attacked. He charged forward and slammed his hands down on their shoulders with the intent of leaving bruises behind. However, he miscalculated his speed by a small margin and toppled the both of them over with him on top. Woops. [Name] let out a strangled cry, probably out of pain for their back landing on the rocky ground. Whatever. This was only the beginning of the pain he planned for them to experience.

**Payback time.**

“What the hell did you do to Ventus!?”

Despite the tears forming in their eyes, [Name] had the audacity to glare at him. “W-What are you talking about?”

He growled and tightened his grip on their shoulders. “ **I’ll** be the one asking questions. What the hell did you do to Ventus!?”

[Name] inhaled sharply but gave no proper response. Was he not inflicting enough pain? Well, better kick it up a notch then. The dark organic material of his suit melted around his fingertips to allow his nails to dig into [Name]’s skin, eliciting a small whimper from his captive. However, that reaction alone wasn’t enough to satisfy him.  

**Why the hell are you pretending to be strong?**

“Tell me, are you a masochist? Or are you just stupid enough to allow yourself to get hurt over a pathetic weakling like Ventus?”

“Ven is not pathetic or weak! You don’t know a thing about him!”

Vanitas chuckled humorlessly as he found himself once again staring down the intense flames burning in [Name]’s eyes. “I know  _everything_ about that useless waste of space. Quit flattering yourself and answer my question before I lose my patience.”

_Give it up already._

“Like I’d tell you anything! Why would I ever want to help someone who always treats me like the scum of the earth?!”

“Because insignificant specks like you and Ventus  _are_ the scum of the earth!”

Rage engulfed Vanitas’s senses as he dug his nails hard into their skin. He heard [Name] scream in the back of his mind, but he stopped caring. All he could see was red. Red as their blood. Red as his fury. He could let his rage consume everything for all he cared.

Yet white hot pain coursed through his body seconds later, enough for him to release his grip on [Name] and fall back to the ground with a groan. The intense feeling of déjà vu overwhelmed his entire being for a moment, but he shook it off and forced himself back on his feet. There was no time to dwell on such an idiotic notion.

Instead of electricity crackling in the air, smoke and intense heat greeted Vanitas. [Name] stood a few meters away from him, keyblade in hand as tendrils of fire coiled around their body. He stared, the image of them wreathed in flames burning into his memory. They looked absolutely radiant—he hated himself for allowing such a thought enter his mind.

[Name] raised their keyblade at him. “I dislike fighting for no good reason, but with you, it’s different. Let’s settle this, once and for all.”

He rolled his eyes. “This won’t be the last time we fight, idiot. But,” He summoned Void Gear and took his stance. “I won’t let an opportunity to knock you back into your place slip by.”

_As if you can win._

“Enough.”

Master Xehanort appeared by [Name]’s side without warning. Startled by the Master’s sudden appearance, [Name] stumbled and dropped their keyblade while the flames once surrounding their body dissipated into the dry desert air. Vanitas scoffed as he let Void Gear go, annoyed at being denied a proper fight.  

**Must you always ruin my fun, old man?**

“Master Xehanort, I’m so sor—” [Name] started, but was interrupted by the Master’s hand landing on their shoulder.

“No need to apologize, my child. I know that Vanitas provoked you into this situation. However, I chose to let this unfold to see how you would fare.” The saccharine smile that always made Vanitas sick to the stomach graced Xehanort’s lips. “I will admit that your control over magic went above my expectations.”

Vanitas gagged at that statement. “You  _should’ve_ been disappointed. They practically allowed themselves to be ambushed and overpowered by me. I could’ve offed them if I wanted to.”

As predicted, [Name] opened their mouth to protest, but was interrupted once more by the wave of Master Xehanort’s hand.

“Vanitas. You and I need to have a long talk. [Name],” He turned back to face them with that falsely warm smile. “You may return to Eraqus. Your little bout with Vanitas was enough to satisfy me. I shall call for you again soon.”

“O-Oh! Um, thank you, Master Xehanort. I appreciate it, but...” They trailed off with a frown, much to Vanitas’s utmost annoyance.

**Just spit it out already, you moron.**

“I’d rather not skip out on training. Are you sure letting me go for this weekend is alright?”

Xehanort chuckled. “I am certain, my dear. Please send Eraqus my regards.”

[Name] bit their lip at the Master’s response but nodded at last. “Understood. Well, I’ll see you soon, Master Xehanort.”

With one final glare sent Vanitas’s way, they summoned a Corridor of Light and disappeared. For some reason, pain stabbed his heart every time [Name] left the Badlands, but he shoved it aside. Why did he care whether or not they stayed? It was a waste of energy to even think about them in the first place.

“Vanitas, you’re becoming soft towards [Name]. This will lead to your downfall—should you let this continue.” Xehanort’s voice became a cold jagged edge, causing Vanitas’s senses to go on high alert out of instinct. Yet he was more concerned about being called ‘soft.’

**Me, soft? You’re the one being so fucking fake to them.**

He scoffed at the Master and kicked away a stray pebble. “Has your age finally caught up with you, old man? If so, I think you need to get your eyes checked.”

As soon as those words flew out of his mouth, Vanitas felt his breath stutter and his feet no longer planted on the ground. A familiar gloved hand closed around his throat as the cruel glint in those golden eyes made his scars throb from the echoes of pain. Was this karma or irony? He couldn’t tell, much less think.

“Have you forgotten to never trust a book by its cover? Well, no matter,” The familiar pulse of darkness filled the atmosphere as Xehanort summoned his keyblade with his free hand. “It’s time for your lesson, Vanitas.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2 is finally here! Thank you all for your patience. <3 Also shoutout to armastusxrahu for beta reading! 
> 
> I really hope you all enjoy this chapter. Took me a while to write it 'cause I had to research how to treat bruises and shit ajdskfls. You guys are so close yet so far from the dark romance part of this fanfic, so I hope this part makes you all anticipate it haha. 
> 
> As usual, thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think in the comments! I really appreciate reading what you guys think about this and you guys may or may not influence how this will end! But we'll see. <3


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